BGS

I have come here to learn. This is not hypocrisy and I will not say that marks donot matter. I feel as good as the next person when I do well and conversely as lousy when I donot (which btw, happens more often)! But that is not why I am here.

I have always believed in the larger picture..and marks donot really have a place there..sure, in 10th and 12th, they were all-important, in order to get someplace one wanted to (and then too, one would definitely have the edge if one learned along with getting good grades, which I mostly did not)..but now that I have got where I wanted to (an MBA for me is just a practical manifestation of what I wanted to do all along..interact with brilliant minds, learn from them, have the best teachers and peer group, get a platform to go out there and achieve all that I want to and learn, learn, learn!)..there is much more to it..

This post is about one of the most enjoyable leactures I had the fortune of attending in my first term..BGS..Business, Government and Society..this was enjoyable because of two reasons..firstly the course content..this course is all about interpreting and analyzing past events - like cultural and economic revolutions, wars, change in governments, changes in policies of nations, how they affect the common man, how various events down history have changed the course of nations - some people would say..a truly 'globe' subject (btw, globe in the IIM B context means something totally abstract)..but I would say - it was heavenly!! To actually go to a place and listen to stuff about the second world war, its implications, the political landscape of India just after independance and how it transformed down the ages..triggers one to think, explore..question..and the second reason..was the professor..

He was an outlier alright..a man with a great presence..a somewhat intimidating presence initially..loud booming voice, long snowy hair, but most of all, no pretensions at civility for the sake of it..he would tell you point blank that your reasoning had 'no compelling logic' and that 'you people are going to become clones of each other in some time'..he would race around the room, challenging us to refute him and once we did, he would brazenly tell us that he was not interested in 'opinions', but only in 'insights'..we have had great debates in his lectures..and outside his lectures..he was in some ways very head strong in his views and if someone differed from him, he would give a patient hearing (the opinions Vs insights thing was just an initial ploy to make us think and not come up with mere platitudes, he started to really listen to us pretty soon into the course), but after hearing, he would mostly not agree with whatever we were saying..but I have often felt that his reasonings were more or less right, he is extremely well-read and has a wealth of experience behind him..there has to be a valid reason for him feeling a certain way..he has given me new perspective on a lot of things and I might not agree with him on all counts, but at least, he listened to me and he made me think..

The only course where we had to analyze the differences between India and China, from an investor's point of view and submit a graded assignment on the same..I loved it!! I loved doing the analysis, I learned so much..I actually, myself, sat and wrote a 15 page report on India and China..without using the fascinating 'Ctrl Cs\Ctrl Vs'!! I was so proud of my report, although maybe some years from now, it shall seem infantile to me..it was something I put my heart and soul into!

He was a compassionate soul, although that aspect of him was difficult to detect, through all the rebukes, his curt remarks, his contrary opinions, he really did care..he took us seriously, our concerns, our nervousness before exams, our welfare..he wasn't just teaching a course, he was actually trying to improve us, to impart some of his experience, his wisdom to us..he gave us certain gems from time to time..

He had his shortcomings too, ofcourse, I do not know whether he stuck to the course outline as dictated by the course requirement, I do not know what we are going to be tested upon in our final exams..but these are small prices to pay, I think..

To all the people out there who are willing to open their minds to perspectives, to abstracts, to the areas between the whites and the blacks..people who are raring to explore.. to go beyond the boundaries of societal conventions - in mind, body and spirit..

Life is all about evolution..if you are the same at 40 what you are at 20, you have wasted 20 years of your life..and a CGPA of 3.9 is not the bullet point that you can put on the resume of your life..

Life..

It has been quite some time since I blogged..I have come a long way, life as I knew it has changed completely..

I have been at IIM Bangalore for more than a couple of months..I have learnt a lot of things and unlearnt some things..it's anybody's guess which was more difficult..

The life here is unbelievable..the pressure exists because people exist who can take it..I will not trivialize it by talking about it..we all know about the spate of quizzes and tests etc..

The people..now that's key..so many talented, intelligent, complicated people bottled up at such close quarters..people who have it all, and nobody will be surprised to see them transform into super-successful hot-shots some years down the line..the differentiating factor is that we all know each other, we can all tell you what a person's strengths are, where he lacks, and where he pretends to lack..

Short-term has a whole different meaning..life in a B school is like a microcosm of life outside..a nebula, dense and concentrated..a miniature capsule of life..it has every emotion - doubt, fear, envy, greed, hunger, agony, ecstasy, love, hate, passion, indifference..all within an area of 12 hostel blocks..

People hide, but are also ironically open about their feelings..people are super-competitive, and sometimes also go out of their way to help you..there are all kinds, and opinions about them change in an inkling..

I have learnt that I am nothing, I have unlearnt that I donot need anybody..I have learnt the true meaning of being down but not out - never out..I have learnt that I have it..inspite of the bad grades, the self-doubts and fears..I have confidence..these two years are going to teach me a lot..and I donot mean Quant and FinAcc..the girl who walks out of these grey walls is going to be very different from the girl who had stepped in..that fateful day in June..I have already vanquished some of my 'inner demons'..I feel like a better person already..

I have re-invented myself..the crux has evolved, not changed, but the outer layer has taken on dimensions that were not there before..any change is welcome..evolution is always good..

On the whole, the experience has been fantabulous and interesting beyond imagination and nothing could even come close..the best of times..the worst of times..