It's Poetry Day!

It's poetry day

I am told

That’s insane

That’s pretty bold

Who reads poetry

People have time?

so unproductive

almost a crime!

We have mountains to climb

or minor hills anyway

who does poetry help

whose bills does it pay?

Words and words

not even so many of them

these poets I tell you

quite definitely lame

Who wants to know

what’s inside their mind

these poets be delusional

and I am being kind

they dig deep

they look long

they reproduce on paper

their feverish songs

They appear quite normal

and if you met one

you’d not know

they wrote poetry for fun!

(because it doesn’t pay any bills, remember?)

But every once in a while

they air out their kook

-say something ridiculous

with a faraway look

You know then to run

for poetry’s alright

poets on the other hand,

best avoided on sight.

A Womanly nap

Yesterday I took a nap

In the middle of the day

Where I got the audacity

I cannot quite say

My cook tip-toed in

Concerned about the daal

That I had forgotten to order

Sleep had me in its thrall

What to make she fretted

Quite upset you see

Such top-notch decisions

Can only be taken by me

She approached my husband

Who was watching TV

Together they found the courage

To come and awaken me

..from this unseemly nap

Come out of nowhere

Leaving matters helter-skelter

A situation most unfair

The daal got ordered

(by husband after I gave a go-ahead)

the dinner menu was conveyed

before I got out of bed

Then I looked at my phone

And lo and behold!

There was a deluge of calls

I was ashamed and ready to fold!

These honourable creditors

Were beating down my door

I had promised them my time

And instead, I’d been a’snore!

I quickly called them back

Assuaging and contrite

(No naps were mentioned)

And all was soon al-right

I was back in fighting form

Willing to do my best

To atone for the past hour

For daring to - rest

Being Human

I look at my son

And wonder 

What to tell him

When the time ever comes

About what it is to be human

Is it to push ahead 

With an evolutionary logic

Fittest, strongest

other forms of ests

Is it to give in

To the tenets of the tribe 

the wisdom of the collective

Whose only goal is self-preservation

Or is it to venture

To go where none have 

To the moon and beyond

To pay no heed to limitations

That our bodies impose 

Is it to think

Or to feel

To endure

Or to evolve

To stay rooted in a past

That no longer seems nurturing

Or to look to a future

Where we are less of what we have been

But so much more 

Is it to love 

Under the light of a moon

That sees no difference

This side that side

All the same 

Is being human in our dna

Or is it in our imaginations?

Does it live in our primate-primitive selves

In the zero-sum game of survival 

Or in that which makes it all worth it?

We write the rules 

We break them

Which of these is really us?

Remember me

Don’t remember me when I go

For my smile
For my grace
For my simplicity
Or cheerful face

I have none of these
Or even if I do
These are not what
I want to be to you

Remember me

For my fire
For my dreams
For my fight
my extremes

For my roughness
For my toughness
For my edges,
prickly hedges

For my spirit
that can’t unsee
Inequities that reach
far beyond me

For my arrogance
that I can change
a tiny piece of the world
I know it's strange

Remember me for my strangeness
For being a misfit
For standing up
when I could sit

Oh and yes, remember me for my love

Measured not in
adoring looks
Nor sumptuous cooks
Few lavish presents
or evenings pleasant
And a home and hearth
to call our own?
Doesn’t interest me
If the truth be known

Remember me for my love

a love that is simple
with the simple creed
that with you beside me
I have everyone I need

The Pursuit of Joy

I need a dose of daily joy

Like tonic for my soul

Like Fevikwik for broken parts

that makes me feel so whole

No matter how bad it gets

Always keep handy a vice

A time-out from your daily grind

And that’s my best advice

It need not be a vice you know

Just something that is special

A sunset, a bath, a phone call

to buttress-harness-trestle

Happiness is hard

Too many parameters at play

Difficult to evoke at will

Impossible to make it stay

But good ol’ joy ain’t that way

It’s like instant noodles

Boil it stir it slurp it

Dopamine in oodles

Yes yes do fix your life

In big and lasting ways

But keep a minute for dear old joy

It’ll keep the blues at bay

What being a woman means

To be a woman

Is to see no difference

And treat myself as such

To hold myself

To the same expectations

Inside the house and outside

To make the first move

To punch above my weight

To stand tall even in a sea of giants

To see the extra layers

And teach myself not to cringe

Someone’s learning by watching me

To let the son know it’s ok to cry

Important to nurture

Necessary to ask

To think no ill

Especially of other women

Whose shoes I haven’t walked in

But to carry the weight

Atlas-like, for all women

I cannot shrug.

For my sisters and daughters

And certainly for my son

I will define who women are

Love is a verb

Love is this and that

So we are told

It will happen to you they say

And we are totally sold

So great is this thing

It will change you my friend

You will feel all the feels

For all of time till it ends

Happiness will be yours

When this manna does drop

You will harvest forever

This bountiful crop

So imagine my surprise

when this promised land

turned out to be a mirage

of an oasis in the sand

Love is not a thing

Love is not a thing

It’s not fate or fact

I daresay I now know

That love is an act

Love is an action

Made of many tiny beats

of care, of caresses

of attentions on repeat

it’s a smile when you’re tired

a kindness when you’re beat

it’s to hold an umbrella

amidst the blazing heat

it’s a decision that you make

and renew on every day

to be an anchor and a safeguard

a refuge in stormy bays

to take the bad with the good

the ugly with the smooth

somedays it’s a struggle

and that’s the simple truth

Nevertheless, you climb that hill

not only for the view

for the company, the conversations

and no one else will do

It may not be easy

and many-splendored every day

love is work

a resolution to stay

So, yes, it’s fabulous and fine

And all very superb

But one must remember

That love is a verb

Be half a woman

I wish a wish

on your behalf

that on this day

you get to be half

Half as driven

Half as intent

Half as amazing

50% percent

Be less

have fewer still,

tasks to do

goals to fulfil

Be a one-tasker

why not I say

one must experience

this too for a day

Go lock yourself

in a room or such

a retreat they call it

not asking for much

Shakespeare did it

(Austen could not)

did the kids eat

was never bethought

And when those kids walk in

look another way

run if you must

go quick I say

Run like the wind

no sweat no worry

lie low think nothing

be ordinary

Be ordinary

a standard issue human

oh and barf at anyone

calling you super-woman

Be half a woman

Be half a woman

for a full day

it won’t be easy

but try it today

#womensday2022

Gehraaiyan

What does it take

To go from blurry lines

to stygian blind

- a pinch of color

Of the wrong kind

A squeeze,

a hint

of looming chill

an undulating road

deceptively downhill

we move around

with masks on

facades of civility

quickly shorn

quick to crack

like crème brulee

to reveal the horrors

we keep at bay

the slope is slippery

the soul is mud

for cunning craftsmen

to mould with blood

to tattoo with needles

with poisonous tips

our dark fates

in hellish scripts

history has shown

many times over

tis true it’s true

and so what must

we do

fight today

the minor tweaks

the casual stripping

the harmless leaks

to snip and nip

this thing in the bud

this evil out there

but also in our own blood

Horcruxes

 

I have many bottles

they sit on a shelf

they are quite pretty

I made them myself

They hold different things

some fizz some settle

some yearn to be let out

like steam from a kettle

I will free them one day

let them fly float fall

vanish like the mist

or take over it all

Just not now my sweets

now’s not the time

not for a little while more

it is not a crime

it is not a crime

I am just too busy

there are things to be done

no time to be dizzy

With laughter and sorrow

loneliness and glee

I will feel you tomorrow

I will. You will see

I will feel every feeling

every last one of you

let you rain over me

and soak me through and through

You must have patience

and wait for that day

till then you are safe

till then you’re okay

And I am okay too

..

I have many bottles

They sit on a shelf

They are horcruxes actually

Parts of my self

I see you

I never took my eyes

off of you

Everything you did

and still do

Is seen

Yes, I see your struggles

but how you're special too

How you create magic

Every day is new

with you

I saw you when you couldn't move

but tried your best

Who then knows you better than me

who knows your dreams, your zest

I see your shyness

your hesitations

I see your stubbornness

your frustrations

But I also see your smile

that lights up the room

I revel in your curiosity

that dispels all gloom

They say mothers are biased

but no,

mothers are the ones

who really know

you.

As I watch you learn and grow

find yourself, find your crew

my ardent wish is that you believe

in yourself, as much as I do

Strawberries on a summer evening

Hello excuse me

Can I be a nothing

no goal no destination

whiling away hours

at some faraway station

watching paint dry

or even the grass grow

wealthy of time

the best kind you know?

Circadian rhythms

restful days

no clocks must exist

vestigial I say

Do I have to earn it

this time abound

or is one born

just - less - bound

by the need to do

to experience to feel

to love to believe

to hurt to heal

I like it

don’t get me wrong

it’s me my choices

my beat my song

but sometimes,

not very often

I wish I could shrug

I wish I could soften

Lead with my heart

feet right behind

take a trip to nowhere

with nothing to find

and no one to find me

but me myself and I

some strawberries maybe

on a summer evenin’ in July

An Imperfect Mother

When I was a kid

Mother was the biggest word I knew

Someone who existed 

Just for you

When I became one myself

My heart split into two

But one thing didn't change

I had dreams for myself too

Dreams and goals

The need for time-outs too

A mother is 24/7

But ain't she human too?

My son makes me happy

When he holds me tight

But I make my own happiness too

I have that right

The right to keep a part to myself

For my own pleasure and pain

The part that is Amazonian

That knows no rein

A passing away

why does a stranger's passing away

affect me so

I do not know

that he did it to himself?

  i imagine the despair

  as if I was there

  but i wasn’t, no one was

  left to his own

  this man that once shone

  his life in the public was inspiring

  prolific, kind, a star

  but he was at war

that we do not know?

anyone’s reality

their complications, their fragility

we still sit as jury

  we speak lightly and loud

  until there is a shroud

  then we speak in poems and eulogies

  we praise the one gone

  we introspect and we mourn 

then go on as usual and be unkind 

to the next person we see.

And that’s the real tragedy. 

Humanity the great misnomer

my spirit looks like my poems
broken, unfinished
should i really be speaking
when i feel so diminished

the world outside is ablaze
my own steeped in a strange mix
of ennui and fatigue
my own shall pass, does the first have a fix?

is it okay to say
that humans are the worst
no spirit no redemption
we ruined all with our thirst

is it okay to say
that humanity is overrated
it is actually a misnomer
if you see the way we have treated

almost everything good
and i no better, am I?
caught in my own petty struggles
i don't even try

selfish and self-centred
it'd be good if we got wiped out
unless we miraculously collaborate
but that's not what humanity is about

Chasing laughter

laughter has ebbed away
one guffaw, giggle, gurgle at a time
I am left today with anaemic smiles
and a chuckle here and there

No no it's not the lockdown
but a general tightening of sorts
of time, of patience
of meeting topics unexpected

an intellectualisation
a brainification
a dialectic approach overall
I realise, like this very attempt

where are you, oh silliness
non-reason return to your throne
i promise won't look down at you
i know now what you bring

Brain in a jar

i want to exist

as a brain in a jar
no corporeal jhamelas
easier by far

maybe powered to a robot
during day time
so i can go places
on legs that are mine
(or kind of mine)

but when the mood strikes
i can just lay on a table
reading or dreaming
in all important ways, able

no need to bathe
or clean the house
do laundry
so where is the grouse

who's fat who's thin
who cares anymore
the beauty industry
will be pissed off for sure

no racism no sexism
brains can't be black or white
brains don't need land
no borders no fight?

just luxuriate all day
netflix and chill
how "chill" you say
well there's sure to be a pill

although come to think
things could go wrong
a discrimination may evolve
between brains weak and strong

knowing us humans
that's probably certain
so let end this mad scheme
let's draw the curtain

we are doomed
to a life full of troubles
let's protect our small joys
our own tiny bubbles

My hand

i see him cradle his head
inside the palm of my hand
it seems to bring comfort
this cushioning, maternal protection

i see him and my heart wells up
with love but also with sadness
that i don't have multiples of these hands
all of them dexterous and able

able to juggle the multitudes I contain
love but also ambition
nurture but also desire
to be more, much more

i wait a split second
then pull my hand away gently
to finish typing that urgent message.
my son must learn to live without 

I stopped making chai

i stopped making chai
it bored me to bits
I wasn't even good
somewhat unfit

i didn't even drink it
'twas only for him
oh he can manage -
fulfil his own whims

we are two people
with very busy lives
prioritise we must
our very separate drives

little did i know
that it would matter
'tween individualism, love
at times choose the latter

the language of love
is made up of these
little overtures and acts
you'd do well not to cease

not cease to perform
these tiny little things
they are the fertile ground
from which love springs

The Monkey loves to jump!

there was a tree
with a monkey
the monkey was as naughty
as naughty can be

chorus:
dadum dadum dadum
the monkey loves to jump

he jumped so high
his head hit the sky
he rubbed it hard
and started to cry

chorus:
dadum dadum dadum
the monkey loves to jump

then mamma said
o son of mine
i told u so
now don't come crying
you did not listen
now you hurt yourself
just promise me this
no jumping next time

chorus:
dadum dadum dadum
the monkey loves to jump

oh mamma oh no
no promise this way
i love to jump
some hurt is okay
i might cry then
but i love to jump more
i love to jump so
from my very very core

chorus:
dadum dadum dadum
the monkey loves to jump

oh son of mine
you are very very odd
your disregard for safety
i dont applaud

chorus:
dadum dadum dadum
the monkey loves to jump

but i learn so much
everytime i jump
the scenery around
how my own heart pumps
adventurous am i
curious too
and that is why i won't
listen to you

chorus:
dadum dadum dadum
the monkey loves to jump