The M word

People keep asking me how life after marriage is and whether it is any different. That's ok. Not complaining. I am sure I have asked the occasional fellow the same question, perhaps for lack of anything better to ask.

I am not so sure about the answer to that question though.

If I list down all the things I do today which I used to not earlier in hair-splitting detail, that will be, no doubt, my answer staring me in the face.

1. Make breakfast in the morning - Yes, and not some amateur cornflaky horror, the real stuff
2. Feel guilty if point number 1 not done
3. Get driven to the bus stop/cab stand, as the day or mood may demand
4. Not talk/message/mail/interact in any other way with the significant other unless the demands of domesticity/good sense weigh heavy
5. Coordinate during office-leaving so as to reach home roughly around the same time. My time zone being Belapur and his hop-skip-jump, this needs some mathematical prowess
6. Feel pride at the spiciness and spanniness of the home on entering
7. Ensure it remains in that same order of spic-span as far as possible during time spent in it
8. Do important stuff like television watching - all sitcoms which have the audacity to present themselves for viewing while simultaneously working, eating and carrying on other important bodily functions

And of course, there are the occasional orbit-shifters - like visiting relatives, entertaining visiting relatives, buying supplies to feed two discerning mouths (but more importantly all the kitchen drawers and refrigerator shelves), paying bills and thinking up and implementing even more new ways of doing up the house.

So while a point-by-point analysis of time spent pre and post ball-and-chain reveal staggering differences, the surprising thing is that it does not feel that way on first thought. It feels like the most natural extension of life as it was. As if one was born to lead this life of domesticity. Of course, there are random longings to hit the pub or dance all-night-long. But it is not really marriage which has curtailed those activities but rather a sickening advancement of age and consequently a slight decrease in the ability to sustain interest in an all-night dance-drink fest. One would rather watch Californication - experience a vicarious hangover and be done with it.

So all you young people who just do not feel ready to be married, because of that huge elephant that's been sitting on your soul ever since you starting walking and understood/heard/ingested that marriage is about commitment and responsibility, just remember that this feeling will not last forever. And that you must wait till it goes away.

Marriage may be about C and R (long and dirty words, do not ask me to write them again) but for me, it has been about doing things together, making plans together, being-in together, going to bed early together, getting hoodwinked by furniture-selling-thieves together. And for those who believe in more tangible proof - marriage is easier on the pocket than singledom. The initial investment into presentable-furniture and flat screens bears good experiential dividends and you would have got those at some point anyway, they are less correlated to marriage than again, a sickening advancement of age and along with it a desire to have your abode not look tsunami-struck. So there are economies of scale and distribution of labor and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

So C and R notwithstanding, wedded life has its moments.

So far, so good.