The flying Dutchman

Carrying on with my discourse on Europeans – here are some interesting tid-bits -

The average French is petite, dressed in black, raven-haired and inky-eyed. The typical French man does not look good – reminds one of a well-bred chimp with a silly crew-cut. The woman too is not one of the prettiest across Europe – but the way she carries herself and her clothes, with her delicate build, pale complexion and ebony hair – she looks sassy, sexy and how do you say it in French – yes, chic.

The German is huge and blond – shaggy haired and broad, he walks brisk and speaks guttural, not in the la-di-dah manner of his Gallic neighbor. The woman too - ditto. The German loves his sausage – hundreds of thousands of types, flavors and varieties. Well, too much meat leads to bad breath. Ouch.

The Scandinavians are tall, broad and blond. The average woman on the street tends to be obese and the younger, more look-conscious counterpart will just be described as voluptuous – Swedish blondes - are supposed to be something else. When I was there, they were someplace else – I didn’t encounter any. One more thing about them – they seemed very startled to see us brown people – I suppose one does not get too many tourists from other parts of the world in Scandinavia. I recall a particular episode where an old woman followed us around Helsinki. She seemed very puzzled by us J

If you want to see good looking men, you should go to Italy. Eye-candy galore. The women there are nice too, but the real sizzlers are in Greece. I saw so many exquisite women in Greece – they were perfect. Apparently the term – Greek Goddess – has its roots in reality. The men in Greece are burly with hooky noses and huge shaggy eye-brows. Good looking, but not Roman-aquiline.

The Spaniards are o-so-hawt. Sunburnt and juicy – like their fruit. They dance well, speak with a delightful accent and are total paisa-vasool. Btw, I am talking about the men here, did not pay too much attention to the women – a girl has to have her priorities right.

There were a lot of Turks (is that what people from Turkey are called?) and Moroccans all over Europe. Dotting the landscape with their doner (a kind of sandwich with huge slices of bread and chicken and salad stuffing) shops, the Turkish people provided gastric relief to us. We met the Moroccans in various night-clubs and they seemed to know quite a bit about India – one was enamored by Shahrukh Khan and kept singing his songs the whole night through. SRK, if you are reading this, your NRI movies have infiltrated into the NRNI (Non-Resident-Non-Indian) section of society too. You must thank Karan Johar in your acceptance speech.

Apart from these episodes with the Moroccans, the most popular Indians there turned out to be – the elder Mr Gandhi, Mr Nehru and Mrs. Sonia Gandhi. Apparently, the Indian political circus makes its presence felt in foreign lands too.

Well, nowadays blogs spark off controversies, and worse – lawsuits. Let me mention hence, that these opinions are just that – opinions. Meant to offend none, harm none. And I completely accede to the fact that they may just be half-baked, given the somewhat limited time-frame of ninety days of observation.